My First Blog

So I've thought about doing this for awhile, but why now?  Well I guess the impetus started the other day listening to the radio and catching the Foo Fighters new single 'These Days'.  I started thinking about death (like a lot of people do) and life and stuff...cool right?  I've been on antidepressants the last couple years and my life has been dramatically changed (for the better I hope) and my thinking is not what it used to be.  I'm don't mull over death and life like I did in before Setraline (zoloft) but it has an odd way of creeping back into my thoughts now and then when a stimulus provokes it.  But I digress, while the song leaves one feeling somewhat melancholy, it did make me think about what the essence of a human being is: their memories.  The other impetus for me starting this blog is David Choe's 'Thumbs Up' on Vice.  Check it out if you haven't.  Basically the way he lives his life is one big piece of art.  He lives life, which is so inspiring.  After some introspection, I realized that the reason why I fear death is the loss of memory.  The moments, the knowledge, feelings, emotions, stories that are forever lost to history when one passes on.  It is not the person that I miss, but the essence of that person.  Memories are what make a person, memories are the soul of a human being.  My fear is that what I have inside me, the memories, the ideas, knowledge, perspective, feelings, emotions, etc. essentially my soul and the memory of me will be lost forever when I die.  It has happened to the billions that have come before us.  Fortunately, the Internet promises to be a medium for the average man to gain relative immortality.  I hope that this is the medium through which I can preserve myself to an extent.  It is a selfish thought, but also a necessary one, in some ways it is a coping mechanism.